manitoubass2 Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 We have a pretty unique household mike, with 6 kids it can be challenging, especially our 14 year old daughter. I feel for ya but it sounds like this has worked itself out. Oh my times have changed. As a ten year old I didnt even know what a vegetarian was, and if I wanted to be one I probably would have caught a swift hand Thats quite the stance for a ten year old, thats why I was kinda speechless. I wrote out about 10 responses and never posted them lol. Whether shes right or wrong you gotta love her determination! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
farsider Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 I thought instantly of someone giving her a biased view as well. No ten year old would form that one-sided opinion on their own. The resolution saves face for both but, in the end you are still the parent. I would engage her in an emotionless discussion to find the basis for her "firmly held beliefs". As an aside, you should contact Lezlie and propose this as a story idea although I am sure this has come up before. Cheers, Mark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NAW Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 She needs to know how you feel about it. And now she does. I'm glad you let her decide. Tough situation. Sorry your going through this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
akaShag Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 This is a "sympathetic ear" post, Mike. I have three sons, the youngest of whom just moved out. All of them marched to their own drum, REGARDLESS of what my wife or I thought or did, and they all still do. I absolutely do not agree with some of their opinions/beliefs/ lifestyle choices but try my best to communicate my disagreement in a mature and loving way. I don't always get that right. I don't agree that trophy hunting is wrong, even though I am first and foremost a meat hunter. My bottom line is "fair chase" and if a hunter takes their game in a fair chase scenario, I don't care if the primary reason for the hunt was going after a trophy (however that hunter defines that term). But that is a reasonably philosophical argument that even hunters can have problems with, and not really fodder for a speech by a young person. So I am not offering any advice here. I think you have received some good advice and some not so good, and your own situation is unlike everybody else's because every person is unique. GOOD LUCK to you! Doug Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
solopaddler Posted March 4, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 Oh my times have changed. As a ten year old I didnt even know what a vegetarian was, and if I wanted to be one I probably would have caught a swift hand Thats quite the stance for a ten year old, thats why I was kinda speechless. I wrote out about 10 responses and never posted them lol. Whether shes right or wrong you gotta love her determination! No kidding eh? My daughter is so much different than I was at 10 it's staggering. I thought instantly of someone giving her a biased view as well. No ten year old would form that one-sided opinion on their own. The resolution saves face for both but, in the end you are still the parent. I would engage her in an emotionless discussion to find the basis for her "firmly held beliefs". As an aside, you should contact Lezlie and propose this as a story idea although I am sure this has come up before. Cheers, Mark Thanks Mark. I asked her tonight where she got th idea from and she swears she wasn't influenced. Knowing my daughter I tend to believe her. It's actually not a bad idea aproaching Lezlie, it certainly makes for some interesting discussion. Do I know you? LOL! She needs to know how you feel about it. And now she does. I'm glad you let her decide. Tough situation. Sorry your going through this. Thanks Nick Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
solopaddler Posted March 4, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 This is a "sympathetic ear" post, Mike. I have three sons, the youngest of whom just moved out. All of them marched to their own drum, REGARDLESS of what my wife or I thought or did, and they all still do. I absolutely do not agree with some of their opinions/beliefs/ lifestyle choices but try my best to communicate my disagreement in a mature and loving way. I don't always get that right. I don't agree that trophy hunting is wrong, even though I am first and foremost a meat hunter. My bottom line is "fair chase" and if a hunter takes their game in a fair chase scenario, I don't care if the primary reason for the hunt was going after a trophy (however that hunter defines that term). But that is a reasonably philosophical argument that even hunters can have problems with, and not really fodder for a speech by a young person. So I am not offering any advice here. I think you have received some good advice and some not so good, and your own situation is unlike everybody else's because every person is unique. GOOD LUCK to you! Doug Thanks Doug, I don't have any issue with trophy hunting either. In this case it was a compromise on her part that was nice to see. She was trying to appease her dad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joeytier Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 Some interesting opinions here. Some people seem to talk like anyone getting into vegetarianism has automatically been swayed by misguided/misinformed opinions. I would argue that most people that opt out of eating meat have done far more research on food production than the average non-outdoorsperson that consumes lots of factory meat. I guess a lot of people associate vegetarianism/veganism with people and organizations that pose a threat to hunting/fishing, and I don't believe that's true in many cases. Many people I know that have tread down the path have done it for 'green' reasons (carbon footprint and all that good stuff) as well as all the typical ethical reasons pertaining to factory animal rearing, and quite honestly, I have nothing but respect for their choices, just as they respect mine to harvest animals from the wild. At least they belong to the ever-shrinking percentage of our population that actually has strong convictions and a passion for something. Anyways, glad your daughter has come around Mike! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Ironmaker Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 I was never blessed with children. After 3 miscarriages my former wife was told the next may end her own life. What I would give to have your problem Mike. Many years ago I was 10 as well and announced to my parents I would only be wearing black clothes for the rest of my life. Beatle hat, black shirt with a black dickie and black Beatle boots. I got a black Beatle belt beating from my father and the spoon on the back of my legs from my mother. I think my Noni got in a few good licks too. To this day my favorite clothing is black, from suits to t shirts. Let the girl form her own opinions, as long as no one is being hurt by them I really don't see the big deal here Mike. I have always said if you think you have it bad go to any Childrens Hospital and look at all those innocent children fighting for their lives and the sheer pain and anguish on the look on the young Moms and Dads. You have it made Mike. I only wish. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kickingfrog Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 No kidding eh? My daughter is so much different than I was at 10 it's staggering. You mean back when there was only one phone in the house and it was mounted to the wall in the kitchen? I guess every generation grows up in the "different world" then their parents but I think it is accelerating exponentially right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manitoubass2 Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 You mean back when there was only one phone in the house and it was mounted to the wall in the kitchen? I guess every generation grows up in the "different world" then their parents but I think it is accelerating exponentially right now. That is undeniable. Social media etc are forming thoughts/opinions at an age never seen before. Schools are teaching things we never seen before. Good or bad? No idea. I personally dont like it. Thats why we spend our time cooking, out in nature, fishing, beading etc. I hate to say it, but when my grandmothers passed, the whole family dynamic changed. We try to be more "traditional", but things still creep in and we debate. Thats a great thing to do with your family. For better or for worse, we as parents can only do our best to educate our children before they embark on their own paths. Im 35 and almost grey already. Its stressful. But I love my family and thats all you can really do. Educate, put your foot down when needed, show alot of love and compassion, support their goals and desires, and just hope at the end of the day they still love you lol. Being a parent is a blessing and a curse. It will show you the best and worst in yourself. Try you at every corner, make you cry, make you proud, make you question everything. It'll drive you crazy... I never wanted kids, now I have 6. The first changed my mind drastically. I wouldnt change it for anything. One day when I pass, id be happy just to know my kids said" he was a loving and supportive dad" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris.brock Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 (edited) I will bet it was a teacher yeah, likely a pedophile too, let's get our pitch forks Edited March 4, 2015 by chris.brock Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirCranksalot Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 Glad to see that you seem to have this one solved, Mike. My general advice would be to remember you are a fisherman---when she fights hard give her lots of line then try to reel her back in gently. If it looks like she's pulling so hard you might loose her, give her even more line. Remember once a parent, always a parent i.e she will never 'spool you'!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GbayGiant Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 yeah, likely a pedophile too, let's get our pitch forks http://www.canadiancrc.com/FEMALE_TEACHER_SEX_OFFENDERS-SEXUAL_ASSAULT_Female_Sexual_Predators-RAPE_MALES.aspx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manitoubass2 Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 http://www.canadiancrc.com/FEMALE_TEACHER_SEX_OFFENDERS-SEXUAL_ASSAULT_Female_Sexual_Predators-RAPE_MALES.aspx Wow. My patience is really being tried on this board tonight. Deep breath, relax, step away from the site Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Acountdeleted Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 http://www.dairymoos.com/no-such-thing-as-a-vegan/ Show her this article. Problem solved. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris.brock Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 http://www.canadiancrc.com/FEMALE_TEACHER_SEX_OFFENDERS-SEXUAL_ASSAULT_Female_Sexual_Predators-RAPE_MALES.aspx exactly, home schooling is the only option, you guys doing that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cram Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 Regardless of whether or not you agree with her, it sounds like you have a strong daughter who sticks to her guns. That's a good thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cram Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 Let me add -- one thing I have pointed to friends who are anti fishing or hunting is how fishermen and hunters are often the first to donate their $ or time to causes around wildlife conservation. You might show her some of that stuff. I'm not a hunter, but from a biology standpoint it's pretty important for management of the resources. And again, good that you have a strong-minded daughter. I'd be happy about that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
woodenboater Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 No kids myself but I'm in the 'let her be' camp. It's a mixed blessing from what I've observed (nieces, nephews, god kids etc), but kids are growing up faster today and in general, are more articulate than when I was a kid roaming my small Ontario town at 4 years old. She may not stay vegetarian or she may, no harm if she does as long as she's making sure she's got her nutrition bases covered. I believe kids who can make this type of decision at that age bodes well for their future imo. Often times it's the ones who go against the grain who stand head and shoulders above the rest. Nurture this Mike and I'll bet you'll be rewarded in ways you never imagined. fwiw, I'd be tempted to have her tested, she may be gifted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sleepjigging Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 I would like to hear her side of the story. Let's see that speech of hers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mike rousseau Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 That's a tough one to hear... You poster child giving a speach that basically explains that she doesn't agree with your hunting and fishing lifestyle... But as others have said she has her opinion and it's hers... Not yours... The speach would be the least of my worries tho... I'd be more concerned about how she feels about you and your practices with fish and game... Talk to her and ask her what she thinks about the activities you do to harvest meat... You don't have to see eye to eye on how you each wanna live your life... But I would make an effort to ensure she understands and respects your choices and lifestyle as well... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Headhunter Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 I have to agree with others in that she simply didn't wake up one morning and decide that from this day forward.... First step for me would be to book an appointment with her teacher to find if the change was initiated through some discussions or course work she was involved with. I would also ask the teacher for some insight into how she works in class and her interactions at school. We all think we know our kids inside and out, but I know how they interact with other kids is not something I have intimate knowledge of. I would also ask their advice, simply because as a professional, they have education and experience dealing with kid's challenges. You don't have to take their advice, but it can't hurt to have more ammunition, so to speak. I have an 11 year old daughter at home and like your daughter, she's 11 going on 30! She has a toughness that my son could only dream about having and the last thing I would want to do as a parent, is stifle that piss and vinegar. Gather more info is my best suggestion. And don't try an hit this issue head on... find a back door to approach to this so she doesn't see it coming and take baby steps with her.... And good luck!!! HH Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillM Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 Pick your battles Mike, the only thing you can do is provide her with the correct information and let her make the decision herself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
msp Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 Mike, I will have to get back to you on this one. I have a Vegan wife ( who is a nutritionist ), and two vegan daughters ( 14 and 16 ) And a bacon eating non vegetarian son ( 8 yrs ) I will have to consult with the wife and get back with an educated response. I have a lot of experience dealing with this You may be over reacting IMO Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Musky or Specks Posted March 4, 2015 Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 Your daughter Mike, when we met,struck me as a strong individual. You should be proud of that. Think of it this way. If she has the will and the strength to stand up to a father she respects and loves she should always have the strength and ability to be an Island in the storm and that no matter what crap life throws at her she'll still be there standing stromg after the storms have past. As for her speech she has come up on her own with what I was going to suggest and that is that during the speech present both sides of the arguement and explain why she has come to her conclusions. She is about to enter middle school mike ...GOOD LUCK. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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