Summer Break's Show & Tell.

[Moosebunk]

It was Kindygarten class. I got to sit at table four by the window and nearest the playhouse. There was me, Rachel, Chuckles and Christine. Christine was the weird one and I don't think she made it to grade 1. Lots of glue chew and crayons went in that girl. Chuckles was my bud, he was tallest in class before me, and Rachel was the brains of the operation, but she was sensitive. We'd all go different ways in life, and even death. Christine was pregnant in highschool and I remember her pushing the stroller around town in my teens. Wasn't my kid, honest Injun. That girl could strut a mean streak though. Rachel cried her way through school every time she got less than A, sensitive, like I said. I worked Chuckles' paper route now and again, lived for hockey and soccer days, explorations into the forests behind his house and many computer games on the early IBM's. He took his own life a few years back, sad days but remembered by me with love. Naps and snacks were the best part of Kindygarten... Here's some fish for show and tell...

 

 

 

 

 

 

Grade 1. Had already been in my first fight with Mike. The Dukes of Hazard, A-Team and the Hulk on friday nights made me a kid killa on the playground. Learned the over-the-top left handed pencil grip to keep the lead letters from smudging on the pages. Penmanship rocked but the reading did not. A, B, C, D were the reading groups and yep, stuck in D for dummy was me. Somewhere along the way there was this short story about a squirrel and I read that sucka so many times it was memorized, almost. My turn came in class and PIZOWY!!! Sped through that squirrel story without so much as a breath. Promotion right there and then to group A, instant teacher's pet. Fatter crayons, corduroy pants and my Buster Brown shoes were in fashion... and here's some fish for show and tell.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Grade 2. Teacher was nice but had an evil eyebrow, kinda like "The Rock" but on a middle-aged, blue dress wearing, short-haired plain Jane. Year was pretty uneventful, but I think somewhere along the way I started parting the hair down the middle and got me some cool sunglasses. In fact, I know that's how it went down. Like every kid in Grade 2, I was the fastest runner in the world. Track and field day that spring was a beauty. 200, 400, 800 meter, no probs. 1500... well it gave ya cramps, distance running is for weird kids anyways. Finally my event, 100 meter dash. Just before the race for the first time ever, couple girls, Cindy and Tawnya ask me to get them a Coke from the classroom and come sit and share with them atop the hill under the old oak tree. Butterflies I tells ya... and I missed the race cause of chillin' with these ladies. Adored that Cindy all the way ti'll the end of College, and made friends with Tawnya for life. Cory Hart was all hit list and my dad sold his plane. Here's some fish for show and tell.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Grade 3 and my best friend Kevin had to write about 20,000 lines on the board that year. I got me a Timex watch with a "start-stop" button on it so I could time how quick I was at doing everything. Could pee a full bladder sometimes in under a second, wish that didn't change. Inside the watch was a little piece of paper with the name of the girl I liked.... and so yes, some girls (like you know who) were always trying to get the time if ya know what I mean? "Red Rover, Red Rover, we call Drew over," and I go running into their arms. It was a never-ending theme. A Utopian society within which I ruled a harem of beautiful pre-pubescent screaming goddessessess. Tape cassettes were $5.99 down at Doctor Music so it took me two weeks of allowance at a fiver a week to save up and get my first ever tape, Twisted Sister's "Stay Hungry," album. Class party that spring I carried dad's ghetto-blaster to school only to find my cousin Darin brought his too. A room divided that afternoon, almost all the boyz with me rockin' out to "We're Not Gonna Take It," while Darin had the girls spun out on "The Summer Of 69." It became a rivalry between him and I for Cindy ti'll the end of highschool, which neither ever won. Windbreakers that could fold up into a pouch were cool during those days, and yeah, here's some fish for show and tell.

 

 

 

 

 

Grade 4 and I slipped into a lifestyle of sex, drugs and rock & roll while out on tour with Men At Work and Huey Lewis and the News. On the playground I rolled for a time with a couple Special Ed. kids, until Trek one day lifted me up onto the play structure by my hair. Trek was fun before that, cause I'd never know if he was going to be the blue train, the blue truck or the brown truck at recess. Blue train was my favorite cause that's when we'd run around the fastest and be the loudest we could. Trek and Raymond were same age as me in Grade 3 but both of 'em had beards and smelt like wet dog farts. Dad bought me a Honda 50 with phat tires, which before long got me some wicked road rash when I laid it down on the dirt trying to race a car. Driving it on the streets in town and on the railroad tracks would get me in trouble too. My girls liked riding with me at times, but along the way, my loves Cindy and Tawnya got accepted to French Immersion and come Grade 5 would slip out of my life for a few years. Much of that year I sported the best looking white leisure suit with Hawaiin shirts, why? Because I was Don Johnson from Miami Vice. Him and Max Headroom were all the rage. For show and tell, here's something else...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Grade 5. Well, my teacher was the Devil and she sent me to the Principal's office 28 times that year. Broke my knuckles on Jason's forehead, only to get the cast off and re-break my knuckles on Jason's forehead again. There was no hope for me, I was addicted to comic books, scratch and sniffs, trading cards and stealing money from my dad's change jar for sugary treats like Chews and Hot Lips. If you didn't want to trade stuff I'd punch you in the face or chuck your tennis ball in the river. Playing guns around the apartment complex, I hit Matt with an M16 in the stomach too, cause they weren't always head-shots back then. Boys those days never got concussions like all the softies today, we got what were called, "the whirlies." We were allowed balls in school too, we played kick-hockey every recess, and all of us boys unless your parents were on Welfare, were enrolled in hockey together. In school we sang O'Canada and said the Lord's Prayer, nowadays that's gone though, and only Muslims have rights in school. I sported Zips, cause laces were out of style and if you were anybody important back then, you had to get your shoes on quick and get out there in the world. Here's some fish for show and tell.

 

 

 

 

 

Grade 6. Being reformed after grade 5 it was all about the Arts. The town police slogan for the kids was, "I'd Rather Be Me. VIP" (very important person) They'd come around classes and show us drugs like magic mushrooms, Angel dust, and Mary Jane. I got the VIP T-shirt. Our cool teacher would take it all a step further in our "sex ed" classes and she'd show us how to protect ourselves from the new killer monkey love bug called Aids. Of course, from my Grade 4 days while in Brazil with the Aussie sensation Men At Work, I'd learned all about that stuff. Prez Bush would say back then, "Just Say No," and who would have known that kids to this day are still saying no to everything except Prozac and Percocets, never meaning to be a say no to work and their parents. At the back of the class, quietly tucked away from the rest, I doodled my arts and played with these balsa wood, skateboard-like finger-boards dad let me make at home with his bandsaw, wheel sander and epoxy. My school ruler for a business sign on my desk, I made cold-hard cash selling those finger boards and later popsicle stick half pipes and skate parks... truth. Better stuff than those Ollie McTwists. Sold the Honda for a Nintendo with Tyson's Punch Out and Mario 2, sold golf balls I'd swim for too. All was balanced until Kevin showed up to class one day wearing a pair of Reebok Pumps. Life after that became all about the size of our calf muscles and how much air we could get. Along with smoking mom's menthols, whipping apples in the fields at bulls and exploring my own body some more, the hot ticket was Jordan in Chicago and the beginning of everything convenient on a disposable planet... For tell and show, here's some fish.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Grade 7. The teacher needed to be timed-out, he was a fruity dood with diva attitude. Guy would consistently cut into or even skip our gym classes for history. Got my first Pro skateboard... yep, you guessed it, Tony Hawk's Skull design. Set the folks back $275 on my Christmas/birthday combo gift but it was soooo worth it as it was the envy of all. I remember the first ride down that hill on Somerset in Ottawa. Swiss bearings, Tracker trucks, purple grip tape over a blue board. I didn't skate thank you very much, I became the definition of skate. It had "hell concave" and a wicked tail. Learned to railslide, tailslide, powerslide, kickflip, pogostick, nosepick, middle-finger-flick and pretty much skin the shins on every street corner. The ankles of little old ladies on the sidewalks got terrorized. Guys with half pipes would invite our skate crew over and we'd rip all over town to get a full days skate in. We were the Bones Brigade Kevin, Chad, Jeff, Emanuel and I, and fast becoming known by the local girls as, Bad Boys. Reeboks sucked already, it was Vans, Airwalks and Converse now, along with MC Hammer pants. The hat said, "Life's A Beach," while my wicked PeeWee Herman face shirt said, "cumming in a theater near you." Mac's Milk Froster brain freezes and a strict diet of french fries, with zits on the face and some fish for show and tell.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Grade 8. Hitting a kid in a wheel chair was my only regret, in a way. He totally deserved it though, and I still graduated elementary the recipient of the "Civitan Citizenship Award." Highschool was just around the corner, and five of the seven girls in my class were now filled out real nice. French kissing Morgan the first time was a real radical thing. Tongue tingly. Scoring chicks and making second base was the badge of honor, I got four badges then. Dad caught on to the fact all his bottles of clearer alcohol were pretty much filled with water now. The same Jason I broke my knuckles on in Grade 4 needed to fight again one day. Asked me to take my shoes off first as he wanted to show off his Karate skills. While he took his off I quickly kicked him in the kiwis with my shoes still on and took off on my BMX. I won. Maestro Fresh Wes, The Chili Peps and Easy-E were for the boys, Skinhead O'Connor, Depeche Mode, Vanilla Ice, the NKOTB, button up fly jeans and Doc Martins for the girls. Some liked GNR too. My fingerboard business had long gone bankrupt, Huey Lewis and Men At Work were out of work too, but I had Tawnya and sometimes Cindy back in my life. My friends and I were all the Kings and Queens of elementary, and although so much had come and gone in my youthful little life, two things in school always remained the same...

 

... there was always a summer break... and there was always show and tell. To this day, those things have never really changed...

 

Edited September 26, 2011 by Moosebunk

[irishfield]

What.. no highschool?? Thanks for the grins and the porn.. oh and fish!

[Skipper D]

I love it ..lol ..lol ..lol . Way ta go Man , what will we do if they ever take away show and tell , Well done and you passed .

[Moosebunk]

Transferred to SFDCI Wayne. That was pretty much the same as dropping out.

[corvette1]

awesome pictures huge gators congrats moose

[adolson]

WINNING!

[irishfield]

Transferred to SFDCI Wayne. That was pretty much the same as dropping out.

 

[ccmtcanada]

Loved that Drew! I'm telling you, you need a book deal...you have a true gift for writing! The fish were ok too! Lol

[fishindevil]

awesome drew !!! fish of a lifetime for sure !! thanks for sharing...cheers

[WeedLine]

Monsters. Great fish and pics. The pike and specks are huge

[LucG]

Amazing pics, simply amazing!

Edited September 26, 2011 by LucG

[Roy]

I've just got nothing to say, Drew. Nothing at all. OK, I enjoyed your school journal as much as your fish pornography. The "Drew Bunker Fingerboards" pic is the perfect closing shot. You should be thrilled to have all of this history for your girls to cherish in later years. Excellent school report. We need another word to replace "report" for your contributions here, Bud.

[johnnyb]

That was a really weird trip you just took me on. "Look deep into the past.....now look at this insane fish! Now look back, and remember the details of your childhood...now look at more massive fish! Ok slow down and remember what it was like to grow up....now more fish!"

 

Maybe I just need a coffee....or maybe I need to look back more...thanks Bunker....I think

[discophish]

Amazing! Like I has said before ... pure talent in both fishing adventure and writing skill. Super creative that you combined the evolution of your grade school childhood while using these epic photos to compare how great life actually is, then and now. Sorry about your friend Chuckles. I can relate to some of your sequences ... from the dirt bike, to Twister Sister, moms cigarettes, hockey, bb guns, skating at skate parks apparently many private properties with burly security, Airwalks, Nintendo, Eazy-E ... I was that weird kid you described that ran the 1500m and 3000m ... however, definitely did not hit a kid in a wheelchair! Thanks for bringing back the great memories that many of us here share with you. Life does come around in a full swing, from time to time. It is always there for you pick it up where you left off, if you allow it to.

[Terry]

Transferred to SFDCI Wayne. That was pretty much the same as dropping out.

 

SFDCI

Smith Falls District Correctional Institution...........just guessing.....LOL

 

great report

[bigbuck]

NICE report!! That's some serious fish porn!!! Those are monstrous northerns and lakers.

[limeyangler]

Great read Drew.

 

I finally got the time to read your post. Original!

 

I was trying from your musical references to work out your age....i came up with 35 years old...am i way off?

 

 

Oh yeah...the fish pics are stoopid good as usual...and the pics with the rapids in the backround are incredible!

[Moosebunk]

Ha HA!!!

 

Doods, truth is, I was bored on saturday afternoon, tired and sleep deprived. Working nightshifts and just sitting around waiting to work. Felt like writing something fun with the idea of a summer end report. The past 3 months and 3 trips have been an exact repeat of 2008. It was an AWESOME summer, and something to show and tell about.

 

Wayne... sorry to knock your highschool. Well, not really. Hehehe!

 

Johnnny and Disco. Hope you enjoyed your strange trip. Disco... it's OK you're a weird long distance runner. All the Docs I work with are too... but what do they know?

 

Limey... BINGO!

 

Roy. I'm done the text and adding the pics downstairs when Leah comes down for a visit. She says with her big grin, "Daddy, look what I found." It was the ruler, and strangely, the second time in a matter of weeks she's done something kinda psychic like that.

 

Thanks doods. Seriously just having fun this time around. All was true, except for Huey Lewis, and the fish were all stage props.

[danc]

Awesome post Bud. I hope we can hook up again next year for a few laughs and a fish or two.

[Moosebunk]

Couple months and the planning for next summer will begin bud. Maybe be out your way twice...

[fishermccann]

Thanks for that It was a great story and brought back some wonderful memories, oh and the fish are great to.

[RickOnt]

Well Bunk!!

 

Amazing!! Simply Fantastic!

 

a Great Read!

 

Thanks for taking the Time,

Rick

[woodenboater]

there was fish porn ? I was admiring the boats trying to figure out who made the ones with the ribs and gunwales

 

and this should be pinned to get us through the long nights ahead cuz it was a great read and I recognize some of those characters from my days in the ps system

Edited September 28, 2011 by woodenboater

[muskymike]

I think I had the most fun reading this post Drew. Every time I read one of your contributions, its like you are right there with you. You are truly talented in that way. Now I sit here in Perth, working in Ottawa, picturing where you were on Sommerset.

 

Just like everyone else thinks, I do too, you deserve to be writing in a magazine where more people can experience what you have to offer.

 

Thank you once again for an incredible journey.

[msp]

Very well writen and amazing pictures. Thanks for taking us along your journey.