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Attacked by a Black Widow Spider Yesterday!

Greencoachdog

By Greencoachdog
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Greencoachdog Fishing God

Greencoachdog

Posted
Posted (edited)

So I'm planting grass seed and covering it with wheat straw. The bales of wheat straw I'm using are a couple months old and have been sitting at the curb of the slopes in my yard to prevent the tilled soil from washing into the road when we get heavy rain, errosion control. These straw bales are wet on the bottom and in the middle, they have every critter native to this area in them... fire ants, a dozen different types of spiders, millipedes, crickets, slugs, wasp nests, and I even found a couple of Leopard frogs underneath them. I had been moving them periodicaly to till and shape where they were sitting, so I know what's in and under them. I wear a pair of heavy welding gloves when I have to handle them for protection.

 

Well yesterday it was time to start using them to cover the grass seed, I put them in a 10 cubic foot yard cart that I pull behind the garden tractor and cut the baling twine and bust them up with a pitch fork... and them spread the straw over the seed. Most of the critters bale out when I start putting them in the cart and the rest leave while I break them up with the pitch fork.

 

I had moved all the bales to where I was going to use them and was getting ready to bust one up when I catch a glimpse of something out of the corner of my right eye, dangling from the bottom of the cart half way to the ground about 6" from my leg! I bent down for a closer look, and yep!!! Black Widow Spider!!! :unsure: I dispatched it with one of my heavy welding gloves and sent it to Spider heaven!

 

So now I'm busting up this bale, and not 4 minutes after killing the BWS I catch a glimpse out of my left eye of black crawling on the left shoulder of my white t-crap!... I instantly soiled myself!!! :blink: Then I did what any true Arachnophobe would do... I freaked out big time!!! I started running, and swatting, and jumping, and hopping, and crying, and screaming "PLEASE DON'T BITE, PLEASE DON'T BITE ME... I DON'T WANNA DIE I DON'T WANNA DIE", and all the while thinking "IT WON'T COME OFF, IT WON'T COME OFF!!! WHY THE HELL WON'T IT COME OFF??? Then after what seemed like an eternity I dislodged Satan's Little Purveyor of Death and caught a glimpse of black fly off my left shoulder on onto the ground and stopped freaking out. I then approached the little Hell Spawn Demon with murderous intent... I looked down and it was... a danged ol' black Cricket!!! :lol: ... laying on his back kicking all of his legs in hysterical laughter! :w00t: ... Yeah it wasn't so damn funny when he tasted the bottom of size 10 hiking boot eh!!!

 

So I lit up a cigarette and started looking around and realized I couldn't see my house???... because...

 

 

I had run about a half mile down the road in my Arachnophobic induced hysteria... it took me 10 minutes to walk back home! :D

 

 

I hope nobody saw me! :blush:

Edited by GCD
camillj Fishing Icon

camillj

Posted
Posted

Now thats funny Dawg ... me ... I have this thing about peekin inside the outhouse seat before sittin down not because I like to scope the size of the pile down below but because .... I have actually seen black widows out there so it not just a phobia ... besides I guess I am specially careful with my pants down round my ankles :)

holdfast Fishing Icon

holdfast

Posted
Posted
I got a felling this story is fake... you said you were wearing a shirt! :rolleyes:

 

That's so funny, but you do have a point. I think Coach batched himself up of too potent of moonshine. The Hallucinated type. Did He say he was working? Huh

Twocoda All Knowing Angler

Twocoda

Posted
Posted (edited)

im still trying to figure out why your right eye was dangling off the bottom of the cart....

 

My regards to your wife GCD....better luck next time ...lol... ;)

Edited by Twocoda
Greencoachdog Fishing God

Greencoachdog

Posted
  • Author
Posted (edited)
Are you a fibb,n Glen?

 

Dang sure is a funny story.

 

 

Pretty much true... but I did embellish a bit! ;)

 

1. I don't know if I was really screaming... but I sure was thinking it!!!

 

2. I don't know if the Cricket was really laughing, but it sure looked like it when he was wiggling on his back!

 

3. I never really left the yard :P

 

 

TroutnMuskieHunter Posted Today, 01:04 PM

.....now that's funny Glen!!!......but, just think how much quicker ya coulda ran if you stopped smokin'

 

It was all pure adrenaline Steve!!! :lol:

 

 

Shore_Lunch Posted Today, 03:35 PM

I got a felling this story is fake... you said you were wearing a shirt!

 

That part was very true!... I was wearing it for protective/safety purposes ONLY!!!

 

 

holdfast Posted Today, 04:09 PM

 

That's so funny, but you do have a point. I think Coach batched himself up of too potent of moonshine. The Hallucinated type. Did He say he was working? Huh

 

I might do more work by accident than you do on purpose Holdie! ;) ... and the drinking doesn't start until the work is done. :P

Edited by GCD
Mike the Pike All Knowing Angler

Mike the Pike

Posted
Posted

Thanks for the great funny story again dog I was reading this but trying not to laugh as I was still in alot of pain from my operation.

 

Good on you for preventing that lovely canadian wife of yours from becoming a widow.Phew :angel:

Greencoachdog Fishing God

Greencoachdog

Posted
  • Author
Posted (edited)
im still trying to figure out why your right eye was dangling off the bottom of the cart....

 

My regards to your wife GCD....better luck next time ...lol... ;)

 

 

I'll give you a shout the next time I find one, so you can come over and kill it with your bad punctuation and capitalization. :rolleyes:

Edited by GCD
aplumma Fishing God

aplumma

Posted
Posted

I don't think that I have heard of a spider dieing from biting a redneck... But thanks for your concern and not letting the spider commit suicide.

 

 

 

Art

pikehunter Fishing Icon

pikehunter

Posted
Posted

Good funny :lol: story. On a serious note we don't get many black widows up here but about a month ago an 80+ yr old woman in Oakville was pulling some weeds from the garden and got bit by one in the hand. She survived.

Jds63 Fishing Icon

Jds63

Posted
Posted

Thats a hilarious story .... I can relate

I had the same type of experience except with one of those large dock spiders crawling up the arm of a chair I was sitting in on my buddy's dock

... never jumped so fast in all my life ..LOL

 

the thing was the size of dinner plate !!! ... well ok maybe the size of toonie

DRIFTER_016 Imperial Angler

DRIFTER_016

Posted
Posted

:rolleyes: EEK A SPIDER!!!! WHAT A GIRLIE MAN!!!! :rolleyes:

Try coming face to face with a 1000# Grizzly at 15 Feet like I did last September!!!! :w00t::w00t::w00t:

I just wish I had an extra hand to take a photo when she was close, but I had my floatrod in one hand and my other was on the Bear Spray just in case.

I ended up with this lame :asshat: shot of her going away at 60 or 70 feet. :wallbash::wallbash:

 

 

Brownie1.jpg

Bly Fishing Icon

Bly

Posted
Posted

LOL!!! Thanks for that Glen...going to keep me laughing for awhile...picturing you shrieking like a girl running all around.....too funny! Glad you weren't bitten :)

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