Handlebarz Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 Ok I have a family friend who has had her husband leave her and her two kids. She has seen a lawyer on Friday ( free from woman's shelter)to seek advice but he said he can not help her as she has to much education and she needs to pay for a lawyer to get money from the ex. My questions are 1 he took all money out of the account on Friday and left $30 but mortgage came out so now there account is -$300 and he will not help with food. She had not changed the locks before this because she wanted to talk to the Lawyer but they would not give her any advice. Can some one let me know is it legal to change the locks since he is now leaving her and the two kids with nothing? Also can she legally keep the kids from him since he is now leaving them high and dry. We live close to Michigan and she is afraid he might leave with the kids. The part that gets me is she had just finished school and has NO job (well she might have one at a local store for minimum wage 10-20 hrs a week but does not have it yet) as her exams were two weeks ago. That is where I get pissed at the lawyer for saying she has to much education to get free help. She has been in school for two years and just finished. Any help would be great mostly for the locks as I want to change them so he can not just walk in like he has in the last 3 weeks since he left. I guess he thinks he can just walk in like nothing is wrong when he wants. Thanks guys Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
esoxansteel Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 Change the locks Mike, the same thing happened to my cousin, where his wife left him and 2 kids, after cooking a great supper the night before as if nothin was out of character, she left the kids health cards on the table and when my cousin was at work and tyhe kids at school, in came the movers and out went the furniture, he changed the locks immediately and there was no issues with the law, booby trap the house with some of your handlebarz so he gets a hook in his hand or arse if he shows up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spiel Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 My legal advice would be to seek legal advice! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tb4me Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 My legal advice would be to seek legal advice! I was going to say the same thing... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ThisPlaceSucks Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 a lawyer can help her out for sure. she's going to have to pay for good representation, but it's a clear cut case of the man having to pay child support. and yes, change the locks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fish Farmer Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 (edited) My legal advice would be to seek legal advice! Same thing here, but I would stay out of it if I was you, could come back and bite you. Plus she can't change the locks. You want to help, tell her to get legal advise, legal aid. An other thing, there's always two stories then the truth. Edited May 14, 2011 by Fish Farmer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
grt1 Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 I would suggest she contact the nearest Ontario Works office, they can provide excellent advice and provide emergency funding for the family. If the husband still has keys , change the locks and get a restraining order that should keep him away from the house if she feels threatened. (just my opinion). Notify the local police of the situation so they don't come to a domestic dispute unaware of the situation should one arise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fisherman Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 Are there any recent court documents awarding her the sole propriety of the jointly owned house? You want to change locks on something you don't own outright? Maybe some of the barrack lawyers should pay her fees. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Handlebarz Posted May 14, 2011 Author Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 Same thing here, but I would stay out of it if I was you, could come back and bite you. Plus she can't change the locks. You want to help, tell her to get legal advise, legal aid.An other thing, there's always two stories then the truth. We are staying out as much as possible but do help her out and have loaned them both $$$ in the past to get through hard times. We are very close and know the whole story, I would get into it all but can not on here. I would suggest she contact the nearest Ontario Works office, they can provide excellent advice and provide emergency funding for the family. If the husband still has keys , change the locks and get a restraining order that should keep him away from the house if she feels threatened. (just my opinion). Notify the local police of the situation so they don't come to a domestic dispute unaware of the situation should one arise. She has been to Ontario works and they will be helping her out. The advice they gave was the same as we did talk to a Lawyer and she did talk to one but he said there is nothing he can do as a free Lawyer she needs to find $$$ to get a real one. He also said that because they were only married 4 years that works against her and she is to educated so that works against her also??? WTH does that have to do with it when your just out of school and not working yet?? Are there any recent court documents awarding her the sole propriety of the jointly owned house? You want to change locks on something you don't own outright? Maybe some of the barrack lawyers should pay her fees. The house is still owned by them both. He did come over today when my wife was there and was not happy that the screen door was locked so he could not just walk into the house They did let him in and he did give her some $$$ but way less then half what he took out of there account. I was just wondering about the locks so she did not have to wait until Monday to go back to Ontario works or wait to talk to the woman's shelter about them. I thought some her might know if its legal to change them. I will not be doing things until I know for sure that we can as I dont need to have my life turned upside down because of this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vinnimon Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 One thing I have tried years back is student lawyers, its much cheaper, but you pay for what you get. I only received minor free advice once. Try calling the local university and inquire. You never know, there may be an aspiring student looking for field work for a thesis. As much as you want to help her Mike, stay clear of any legallities that may come your way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daplumma Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 I would say that if she was having problems with the locks on the door then she should change them.Its just simple home maintenance.Its just bad timing that her key broke off in the lock. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GBW Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 I would say that if she was having problems with the locks on the door then she should change them.Its just simple home maintenance.Its just bad timing that her key broke off in the lock. Joe best answer right there! PS, keep the damaged lock on a shelf in the garage for proof PSS, Don't do it for her Mike, just hand her the tools needed when needed so you are NOT the one that changed the locks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fisherman Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 best answer right there! PS, keep the damaged lock on a shelf in the garage for proof PSS, Don't do it for her Mike, just hand her the tools needed when needed so you are NOT the one that changed the locks. Ya, right, I would say neither of you should be giving out legal advice or any hints of doing things that can give her grief down the road. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GBW Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 now, what if she did break the key in the lock trying to get into the home? how would that work out? i'm not saying it's leagal or not but something would need to be done to fix it so she can get in and out of the house and secure it at the same time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Terry Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 Yeah but unless she gets a restraining order, a changed lock only slows him down..and she will be paying for the broken window or door..because without some legal papers he has every right to come and go as he pleases Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mercman Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 Yeah but unless she gets a restraining order, a changed lock only slows him down..and she will be paying for the broken window or door..because without some legal papers he has every right to come and go as he pleases Absolutely Right Terry.Best thing she can do is talk to the police 1st of all, then talk to some of the womens help centers, for info on lawyers specializing in this kind of scenario, and for assistance by other women who have experienced the same thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spincast Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 now, where did I put that 10 foot pole? Be careful that your compassion doesn't cost you when the poop hits the fan later. These things frequently end civilly - civil court that is. Support for sure. Directions? Maybe not - especially on the internet? Be there to support your friend for sure, she obviously just got the shaft, but beyond that I woud tread carefully Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irishfield Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 Wait 'till the courts tell them they have to co-habilitate in the same house until all their assessments are completed......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dhickey Posted May 15, 2011 Report Share Posted May 15, 2011 (edited) having gone through the same type of event last year I can say that yes she can change the locks. In my situation my lawyer sent a letter as well as email stating that the locks will be changed and that my ex had 2 weeks to get her personal belongings out of the house. After that date all locks were changed and any personal belongings disposed off(20 yrd bin). As for legal help legal aid seems to be her only option now. this is easy to get look it up on line . If her name is on the morgage and she is not working it should be easy for her to qualify because leagle aid will put a lien against the property to enshure they get their money when the house sells or a settalment is reached. Of course this all takes a bit of time but in the short run she does have other options. she can apply for a restraning order if she fears violent confrontations but she has to be able to support her claim ie. domestic violence or previous assult charges on any one not just her/drug offences or any criminal charge in the past. afidavids should also be provided by people supporting her fear. she may also want to concider going to family court on a MOTION this is to be done if the welfare of the children is at risk and stability of the family home ie. missed morgage payments/utilities exctra. This will take alot of work on her part in a verry short amount of time. Contact the cuorthouse in your region to get started. The pourpose of this would be to get a court order forcing him to live up to his obligations if he chooses not to he will not be viewed with any favor within the family law system(in other words he screws himself) Another resource you can use is the FRO web site to learn more about valuable resources and how to help secure a somewhat stable future for the children. any way you look at it seperation and devorce is a hard road full of negative emotions the best thing for her to do is not confront him personaly when emotions are high and dont be spiteful. Most of all all people involved must be CIVIL..! Edited May 15, 2011 by saltydawg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fish Farmer Posted May 15, 2011 Report Share Posted May 15, 2011 As I said Mike, all cases are different. Don't listen to me or others. Let her and her husband work things out. It could cause friction between your family. Just stay in the shadows when the kids need help. Adults and the lawyers will sort out there deference's. Some time it's hard Mike because it's family. But who said life was easy. Just be there with a big shoulder. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ehg Posted May 15, 2011 Report Share Posted May 15, 2011 Sounds like a tough situation for the kids. A fishing forum isn't going to be able sort out the legal issues however. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Bacon Posted May 15, 2011 Report Share Posted May 15, 2011 having gonE through the same type of event last year I can say that yes she can change the locks. In my situation my lawyer sent a letter as well as email stating that the locks will be changed and that my ex had 2 weeks to get her personal belongings out of the house. After that date all locks were changed and any personal belongings disposed off(20 yrd bin). I wouldn't just assume that she can change the locks because you were allowed to. Her situation my be different that yours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cookslav Posted May 15, 2011 Report Share Posted May 15, 2011 Forget the locks...Get a dog A big burly, nasty dog LOL! That'll teach him In all seriousness...lawyer up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Handlebarz Posted May 15, 2011 Author Report Share Posted May 15, 2011 Thanks for all the pointers they are well taken. I have a to do list for today now 1st stop by junk yard steel there dog 2nd get extra keys made 3rd break off extra keys in all doors 4th go back to Rona and buy three new locks to replace them broken locks 4th get more keys made don't break off in locks 5th go to hockey message board to get correct advice on divorce 6th cancel the 20 yard bin 7th go to collage and look at girls to pick out free lawyer 8th take old locks out of garbage and re install them have her do it because you were making check list backwards and just noticed this advice after changing the locks 9th place order for extra windows 10th keep my nose to my self as I have to many lures that need to be built so get my fat arse off the computer and out to the shop. I do appreacite the advice here everyone I knew in my head most of it but ya all know its nice to have yourself re assured my big concern is the free lawyer that was given to her did nothing that still confuses me. The part of her having to much education even though she just got done school. Any way she will be back to the woman's shelter Monday and then to Ontario works and a couple other places to seek advice she is a very strong girl but I thought I would see here plus you can always count on OFC to bring a different light to every situation and crack the smiles. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now