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Tell A Story About An OFN'er


Guest ThisPlaceSucks

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Guest ThisPlaceSucks

We all got some funny "fish tails", so let's share some funny moments on the water.

 

 

I've been fishing with troutologist for almost 15 years so we've pretty much seen each other at our best and worst. Several years ago on a May long trip the party of guys were all on shore soaking for lakers. While we had some beverages and enjoyed the sun, a barely audible bell began to chime it's unmistakable proclamation... FISH ON!

 

While we all eagerly scanned the horizon for our rod tips, it was Jay whom began dashing towards his line. As he finally grasped the rod between his bear-like paws he did his best Bill Dance impression and set the hook as though he was plunking worms in the slop... Suddenly, as though propelled by rocket fuel his bell flew over the treeline and into the atmosphere. This bell was last seen on radar over white river, ontario with no signs of slowing.

 

Another story about troutologist himself...

 

One brisk may we spent a night at my old family farmstead north of home in hopes of tangling with some brookies. In the morning we sped out fishing, only to freeze our buns off for one fish. Defeated and cold, we paddled back to the shady and steep take out. As he attempted to dismount he stumbled and grasped for a frail cedar on the shore. The cedar, almost in slow motion, slowly uprooted... it took 4 seconds until finally his back his the water... it was demoralizing yet oh so funny.

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Worm Dangler calls and says "Let's try a new lake." Up Mile 38 we go, get to the lake, mosquito's thick as the night is dark. Water was too shallow at the launch to even get out fishing. "No problem he says" "Ya, we'll just go to Tilley and bust some Bass." Well that sounded just swell. Now folks...Wormies never used boat trailers much...so watching him try and turn a truck around with a boat on it was quite amusing. I'm in the passengers seat and we have a ditch infront of us...Worm sloooooowly pulls ahead as close to the ditch as possible then....CLUNK...in goes the front end...

 

 

2 hours of feeding the skitters pushing that damn truck out was a sobering experience.... :jerry:

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I'll share the story of my first OFC GTG.

 

After joining the board, I heard about an annual GTG at Lakair each June. Of course, I wanted to attend and put some faces to the board names. Unfortunately, we ended up moving in to a new house, so that used up all of my extra vacation days for that year. :( But - I was committed to making the next one.

 

So, next year came and everyone started talking about it, so I made a few posts asking a bunch of questions. I knew I would be there alone, wouldn't know anyone, and had no boat. Several of the members encouraged me to come up and that I wouldn't have any problems finding a seat in someone's boat.

 

Well, I arrived on a Tuesday, checked in, and met ChrisK in the lodge. Chris invited me out immediately (and I wasn't even unpacked). I quickly set up the camp site and off we went. Came back for a little and back out again that very same evening. Chris and I pulled our resources and had some Walleye for supper. Chris put me on my very first Walleye ever. Chris and I spent the next few days fishing here and here.

 

Later in the week, as more and more people showed up, I had more offers to head out on the water. I think I ended up fishing with Irishfield, Aplumma, Deg, Loonietoon, and probably a few others.

 

I think, in the week I was there, there was only one day that I didn't get out on the water at all. But, I still managed some nice pike off the dock and along the shorelines that I could get to. But Hey - I didn't care.

 

Overall, I really felt welcomed by everyone, had a great time, and met lots of great people. This year, I think will be my 4th GTG, and my wife's second. Patsy came along last year and had a great time and also made a lot of friends.

 

So, I'll give this as a testimony to all the great people who are part of this OFC Community. HOpe to see you all again in June and hopefully some new faces as well.

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Guest ThisPlaceSucks

Worm Dangler calls and says "Let's try a new lake." Up Mile 38 we go, get to the lake, mosquito's thick as the night is dark. Water was too shallow at the launch to even get out fishing. "No problem he says" "Ya, we'll just go to Tilley and bust some Bass." Well that sounded just swell. Now folks...Wormies never used boat trailers much...so watching him try and turn a truck around with a boat on it was quite amusing. I'm in the passengers seat and we have a ditch infront of us...Worm sloooooowly pulls ahead as close to the ditch as possible then....CLUNK...in goes the front end...

 

 

2 hours of feeding the skitters pushing that damn truck out was a sobering experience.... :jerry:

 

 

so next time you're driving i guess eh?

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This one is ALL ON ME:

So the much anticipated weekend has arrived......I'm goin' up to the kawarthas to meet and greet some fellow OFC'ers. Big Cliff is first on the list. He sends me detailed directions....I have a GPS. Need I say more? Yes I do. I plug his address into the GPS, it finds it no problem at all. So up the 115\35 I go. I recall that I need to drive to the first light, la de da de da, I drive PAST the exit for 35 to Lindsay 'cause there is no light to be seen as of yet. When I get to the 7a exit I'm thinkin' (a rare thing for me), I didn't think I needed to drive all the way to Peterborough.....This is at 6:30 in the morning, Cliff said that he is up at 5 am every morning so I reluctantly decide to call. I wake up his wife, (an incredibly warm woman BTW), and she gets out of bed and goes to the top of the driveway into the shop and lets Cliff know that I need directions. (All of this time my GPS is telling me that I need to go back, but, NOOOOOOOO I know better because I remember the directions that Cliff gave me. Well to make a long story shorter, I managed to find his home, (nestled right on the shore of Sturgeon lake), and sat down to a coffee, while waiting for Beans, my fishing partner for the day. We laughed about my misadventures on the way up, and put that down to experience.

Beans arrives, introductions are made, equipment compared, anticipation of a good day is in the air. The downpour had stopped, the sun was out, life is GOOD! So, off to the launch we go, the launch went smoothly, Beans is in my, (yet to be slimed), boat, with no trouble at all. I park the van and trailer, make my way to the boat, fire her up and help Beans into the dodge van captian's chair that I had mounted on the front bench seat of my 14' narrow beam boat. Now, a word about Beans.....Besides being one of the nicest and most worthy of respect men that I have had the pleasure of meeting, he is also an very experienced fisherman. He's gotta have 30+ years of experience on me. As well, he is a large man, in heart and goodnature as well as girth.

OK here is the situation, an older, robust man sitting on a seat that is elevated 8 inches above the gunwales supported by a 10" circular base fastened to a fiberglass bench seat . The base is 12" high. Nothing wrong with that picture, right?

So here we are on the lake; Beans has pulled in two perch, I am still waiting to get a bite. I ask Beans how he likes the seat, "It is very comfortable" he says. I am curious as this is the shakedown cruise with the new seat. I believe him and envy him as it does look very comfy. Beans leans back as he says this, and to my abject, unaldulterated, complete HORROR! he continues to lean back and back and into the drink he goes! I still have a vivid mental image of Beans' head entering the water, he completley upside down, still seated in the chair, legs kicking vainly in the air for some type of purchase, with a look of absolute shock and surprise etched into his face.

Now at this moment in time I am thinking that I have killed him, he is going to drown, and it is my fault. So I do what any reasonable man would do, I panic. Thankfully he does not. Beans makes his way to the surface clutches at the side of the boat, and says something to the effect of " That was interesting", and I am thinking how the hell am I gonna get him back in??????!!!!!

Fortunatly there are two men nearby in a bass boat, I call them over and they CALMLY get us cooled off, well Beans was already cool, he was IN the water after all, and get Beans into a life jacket, haul him into their boat, and transfer him back to mine. They were the true heros of the situation, regretably we did not get their names.

(So if you recognize this situation, and lurk the board, THANK YOU!!!!!!) If you are members here, stand and be counted.

During all of this Beans is concerned for me, because he can see the huge impact that this has had on me. I am not doing well....

Need less to say, that was the end of the outing.

Beans I owe you an apology, and thank you very much for your freindship that was offered despite my attempt on your life.

Cliff I appreciate the sage advice given after this incident, and will take it to heart.

So, do I need to say anything about ALWAYS wearing your PFD????

More about the weekend tomorrow and meeting some more OFC'ers

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We were at the first annual GTG at Quinte. Now there were lots of people there and it was really cold so everyone was using anti-freeze to keep their veins pumping.

We had all piled into someones cabin. There was much festivities and drinking going on . JP decides, "Hey we need some BBQ sausages". He pulls out a big whack or sausages from the fridge ( you know the good raw kind) and heads outside.

Now JP was rather wobbly by then so many of us went outside with him knowing this would somehow be entertaining.

JP lifted the lid to the BBQ and turned on the burners...all of them..full blast.

He then starts fumbling around for a lighter. Only sober people do that first. Finally he finds one..about 3 minutes later. The was a bit of a wind..not much, but it was enough to stop his lighter from igniting. We had tried to warn him..but, well..

We were all taking slow steps backwards now. Except for JP of course. He tried and tried to get the lighter going.

Finally..SUCCESS!

He gave us all a big grin as he shoved the lighter into the opening of the BBQ. now what happened next is hard to describe cause I had my eyes closed for some of it because of the force of the blast. Propane sinks..and it somehow lit from the bottom up creating an amazing upward force blowing the BBQ about 20 ft into the air. After the mushroom cloud settled, there was JP...putting sausages onto the raging inferno.

Now, some of us were still laughing, some counting body parts. JP was sans eyebbrows and was plunging the tongs into the raging flames to turn the sausages.

Funny thing about huge fires is that they make food look cooked...when it ain't.

JP brought the sausages into the cabin. We tried to warn the others, but we were called a few names and shoved aside.

So, as the raw pork had time to spend the night mixed with beer, whiskey and everything else, the morning soon came. Time to fish!!

I thought it was cheating as I watched a few guys chumming off the boats. We had to hang on to JP cause he had it pretty bad having eaten 6 of the sausages....he said he thought he had a virus...oh, did I mention the four foot rollers that day??

He he.

 

Quinte #2

 

We had dutifully purchased a bunch of Dr Death lures cause thats what we heard was the ticket to success. After being skunked on the water, we came in and were fishing the docks at night. A local was slaying them...literally. Monster walleyes filling the back of his pick up truck.

I finally got a peek at his lure..a 3 inch perch coloured Salmo.

We all switched to perch color in spite of the bay being thick with shad and some of us managed to do okay.

That night we were on the roof of the motel....I have no idea why. But we were talking about how we just bought these lures cause someone said so and we wondered if it was Bull.

So Roy, doug and afew others decided then and there that we had caught all our fish on a lure..a lure that didn't really exist. We called it the Jumla.

We told everyone about them. On the site, on the street, everywhere.

I had a buddy of mine who owned a tackle shop put up an empty display of what was labelled Jumla Lures. All the product hooks were empty and I attached some re-order tags to all giving each row a different color and style.

So now everyone was looking for them...one guy even came here swearing his cousin in the US just sent him some.

We let this go on for ages...even inventing Heinrick Jumla. CEO of Jumla Fishing. We had Jumla decals made and just had a blast with this for ages.

 

Soon the truth came out. But then Avery (TJ's son) asked is he could make REAL Jumla lures. We thought that was great. When the lure first came out..its first week actually, BiteMe won the pike derby on a new and real Jumla.

The Legend was reborn!!

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Yes, great thread! Let's burn them all. Dang, am I ever glad I've always managed to stay out of these controversial stories. :tease:<br><br>Hey Marty...you know anything about that perch?<br>

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Heres a good one. We were in Picton two yrs ago fishing walleye. Was the end of november and we were staying at Merlin Park. The fishing was out of this world. So the first evening we had a big dinner and a few drinks and hit the sack early. Day ywo was even better and The lads from Fishing Canada were there to do a shoot. There big deck boat was parked right beside our boat and we thought that was pretty cool. Well after I had a half a jug of Wisers in me I grabbed my camera and told my chum to come with me, I want to get a picture of our rigs parked side by side. So we make a drink and head to the dock, its about 11 at night and I snap off a few picks and my chum says why don't ya get in there boat and sit behind the wheel and I'll take your picture.

 

I thought about it and said if they see us they probably won't say anything there a pretty cool bunch of guys. So in I go, get behind the wheel and my buddy starts taking pics and of course I'm performing now in high gear hat on backwards the whole deal. He's pissing himself laughing so hard and snapping pics, flash is going off like a strobe light. We finally make it back to the cabin without any incidents and check out the pics and they were all siht cause he was laughing to hard and shaking to much while her was taking the pics. There was six of us and I couldn't get anyone to go back and take some better pics. But there still not to bad just a bit blurry. Pete and the boys never did find out but they might know now so I will apologize for my chums dumb idea. I brought the pics back with me last year and the guys all had a good roar.

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A couple of years ago I was fishing on Georgian Bay and hooked into a nice size smallie, I asked Tbayboy if he could grab it for me as it was a nice size,he was kneeling down on the back deck of the boat and we were going to take a picture when the fish flipped back into the water. I think I said 'I can't believe you just lost my fish' jokingly, and he reached over to grab it and his momentum carried him into the water. At the time I didn't laugh because he could have hurt himself ,which he didn't. But now I can laugh about it.

 

Luckily I had extra clothing in the boat and after changing we continued fishing the rest of the day.

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A couple of years ago I was fishing on Georgian Bay and hooked into a nice size smallie, I asked Tbayboy if he could grab it for me as it was a nice size,he was kneeling down on the back deck of the boat and we were going to take a picture when the fish flipped back into the water. I think I said 'I can't believe you just lost my fish' jokingly, and he reached over to grab it and his momentum carried him into the water. At the time I didn't laugh because he could have hurt himself ,which he didn't. But now I can laugh about it.

 

Luckily I had extra clothing in the boat and after changing we continued fishing the rest of the day.

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I've got the '04 and '05 Nip toques. I remember finding the lid I blew off the bbq on the lawn a few paces away. I figured if I cooked them I may as well eat them. That was pretty much the last thing I ever made explode. Raw pork will mess you up. My best story from that night was Adam tearing his tshirt into strips and jamming them in his ears because Lew and I snore so bad.

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