So sorry to read this Matt and unfortunately there's no great words that I can put together at this time. Been there and still have the "program" unfortunately and mine passed from this miserable disease in 1986 at 59 years of age.
If I can put anything together in type, I can offer this..... it's a good thing you think of him a few times a day... some can just walk away. Those that cared for their parent, no matter the circumstances, can not. I didn't get along well with my father from the time I was about 11 until he died when I was 24 (and by then I already had 2 kids). Maybe it was me, maybe it was him, but the respect was still there deep down. When it came to Grandchildren, and Leah and I marrying at 18 & 20 for that matter, he stood behind it all with pride. There's not a day that goes by that I think of something that I did.. he did or didn't do. Good or bad the memories are all there and they will be for you in regards to your father on a daily basis. Some will make you smile, some will make you cry.... others will just make you ponder on how to be a better man.
Be well.... and PM if you wanna chat. I'm home for the winter by the looks of things.
Wayne