oldphart

~~~~Great report bud, but where's the pics, or a least hand drawn crayon pics???

~~~~I got it on my Christmas wish list.

~~~~~AAAAAH youd guies Y can't we get a long, It's the message that counts, no mater how it's spelt

~~~~Caught the Flu Bug last weekend on Simcoe, been sick all week, going to stay home in bed this weekend

~~~~Finally the tide turns, great shot

Humans originally existed as members of small bands of nomadic hunters/gatherers.They lived on deer in the mountains during the summer and would go to the coast and live on fish and lobster in the winter. The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to get man to the beer. These were the foundation of modern civilization and together were the catalysts for the splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups: 1 . Liberals 2. Conservatives. Once beer was discovered, it required grain and that was the beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed. Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to BBQ at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the Conservative movement... Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting learned to live off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly BBQ's and doing the sewing, fetching, and hair dressing. This was the beginning of the Liberal movement. Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women. They became known as girlie-men. Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the concept of Democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that conservatives provided. Over the years conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass for obvious reasons. Modern liberals like imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare.. Another interesting evolutionary side note: most of their women have higher testosterone levels than their men. Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, dreamers in Hollywood and group therapists are liberals. Liberals invented the designated hitter rule because it wasn't fair to make the pitcher also bat. Conservatives drink domestic beer, mostly Bud or Miller. They eat red meat and still provide for their women. Conservatives are big game hunters, rodeo cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, police officers, engineers, corporate executives, athletes, members of the military, airline pilots and generally anyone who works productively. Conservatives who own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living. Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to govern the producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in Europe when conservatives were coming to America . They crept in after the Wild West was tamed and created a business of trying to get more for nothing. Here ends today's lesson in world history: It should be noted that a Liberal may have a momentary urge to angrily respond to the above before forwarding it. A Conservative will simply laugh and be so convinced of the absolute truth of this history that it will be forwarded immediately to other true believers and to more liberals just to piss them off. And there you have it. Let your next action reveal your true self.....I'm going to have another beer.

~~~~~AAAAAAH it's been great PHISHEN here

~~~Great to see the Pool still has some great Bass, haven't phished it in years

~~~~I im neever rong, may not be always write, but neever rong

~~~~I also only visit threads that catch my interest, and most of my threads are deleted cause i hurt some Mod's Idea of a proper subject

~~~~~But, but I don't know what lake you were phishen, but great report just the same, now I'll go to PHlash Earth, and zoom in to see if I can phind it

~~~~I like phishen for Perch, so the Nile Perch is on my bucket list

~~~~So it's okay to snag them, great, but what this that Phish is spelt with an F, next you'll be telling me Pharmacy is also spelt farmacay, some of uses guies spell phunny

~~~~The question was if I foul hook them, to be a proper phisherman, should I release them??

~~~~While out this past weekend I got into a large school of Gobbies, and of the 5 landed 4 were foul hooked. Now I know as a Phisherman you should release any foul hooked phish, but does that also include Gobbies????

~~~~Had a Foreman ask me once if I was Screwing the Pooch, asked him if he wanna to buy a Puppy

------------------------- 1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you. 2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name. 3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor. 4. A dog's parents never visit. 5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across. 6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day. 7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk. 8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing. 9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, If I died, would you get another dog?? 10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away. 11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert. 12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting.. 13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck. And last, but not least: 14. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.

~~~What better day to be out there on Simcoe, Slug, Paul, and I headed out of the Glades on Sunday morning, with light winds, warming temps, and bright blue sky, this is going to be a great day to be on the water. As we left the breakwall I spotted the main fleet sitting out on the far shoal, but the Terns were diving and hovering just off the river mouth, so like always I followed Capt Ahab's advice, and went to where the birds were, and sure enough in 24' a large school just off the bottom, and like usual Slug was first with a nice Jumbo, and then another and another, well I was finally able to catch up, well came close any way, Then paul started to catch up Our top lure was a gold spoon tipped with a minnow. Here's a shot of our harvest minus the 5 dead Gobbies, and My cell phone that somehow landed in the well with the Perch. we took home about 15 each

~~~~Great post, who says you can't catch eye on a sunny day

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it.) If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb. (Now that's more like it!) The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet. (O.M.G.!) A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes. (O.M.G.!!!) A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death.(Creepy) (I'm still not over the pig.) Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour. (Don't try this at home;maybe at work.) The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off. (Honey, I'm home . What the...?) The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field. (30 minutes. Lucky pig! Can you imagine?) The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds. (What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?) Some lions mate over 50 times a day. (I still can't believe that pig ...quality over quantity.) Butterflies taste with their feet. (Something I always wanted to know.) The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. (Hmmmmmm.......) Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people. (If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?) Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump. (Okay, so that would be a good thing.) A cat's urine glows under a black light. (I wonder how much the government paid to figure that out.) An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. (I know some people like that.) Starfish have no brains. (I know some people like that, too.) Polar bears are left-handed. (If they switch, they'll live a lot longer.) Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. (What about that pig? Do the dolphins know about the pig?) Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread these crazy facts and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to, maybe even a chuckle. In other words, send it to everyone! (and God love that pig!)

~~~Yes another great day in down town Tarona,(TO to you out siders) Police chopper hovering over head, protesters camping out in the park a block away, Union Station jammed with Police waiting

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35. For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy. Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some my father that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for awhile.. An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am. Old guys always get up early to pee, so what the hell. Besides, like I said, I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-bugger. If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser. Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling. They could lighten up on the obstacle course however... I've been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training. Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too... I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet. An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head. These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way. Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple million pissed off oldpharts with attitudes and automatic weapons, who know that their best years are already behind them. HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50...in menopause!!! You think MEN have attitudes?? Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put them on border patrol. They'll have it secured the first night!

~~~~Had plan to get out this weekend but both usual partners have to work,So I'm wide open either for Sat, or Sunday. If you got a vehicle with a 2" ball, send me a PM and lets wets some line

~~~Great now you gave them the location to only Cathouse that will let me in, (they take Can. Tire Money at Par)

~~~~dam ~~you gave away my phishen spot, great to read you got into them I'll be out there this weeken chasing all the Yankees off my spot. It's the one with the Yellow X