Bernie Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 SUMMER CLASSES FOR MEN AT THE LEARNING CENTER FOR ADULTS REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY June 29, 2008 NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM. Class 1 How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays --- Step by Step, with Slide Presentation. Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM. Class 2 The Toilet Paper Roll --- Does It Change Itself? Round Table Discussion. Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours. Class 3! Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub? --- Group Practice. Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 h ours. Class 4 Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor --- Pictures and Explanatory Graphics. Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks. Class 5 After Dinner Dishes --- Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink? Examples on Video. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM Class 6 Loss Of Identity --- Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other. Help Line Support and Support Groups. Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM Class 7! Learning How To Find Things --- Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming. Open Forum . Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours. Class 8 Health Watch --- Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health. Graphics and Audio Tapes. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. Class 9 Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost --- Real Life Testimonials. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined. Class 10 Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks? Driving Simulations. 4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours. Class 11 Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife. Online Classes and role-playing . Tue sdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined Class 12 How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours ! beginning at 7:00 PM. Class 13 How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy --- Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late. Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. Class 14 The Stove/Oven --- What It Is and How It Is Used. Live Demonstration. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined. Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danbo Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 Don't go..I flunked that course twice already!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Casey123 Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 Upon completion of any of the above courses,diplomas will be issued to the survivors. I bet they do not issue many diploma's Besides, that is 22 days that you could be fishing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lunkerbasshunter Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 lol that was funny CHeers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gerritt Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 DO not give in to the special interest groups! We better hold a rally and start a non-profit Bernie... Next thing we know the Spring bear hunt will be gone! Ohhh Wait.... G Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
walleyejigger Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 Class 9 Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost --- Real Life Testimonials. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined. i know this is fake because, men don't get lost, we like to "tour" new places Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarzan's Jane Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 Isn't there a waiting list...haha I think they got it all covered...except I can think of one other How To Blow Your Nose Without Disturbing The Neighbours Who Live A Half Mile Away And How To Flatulate Wthout Wearing That Stupid Grin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bernie Posted April 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 This just keeps getting funnier along the way! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Cliff Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 How To Flatulate Wthout Wearing That Stupid Grin Trust me, it can't be done, it's a hormone thing, men are just born with it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HTHM Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 Another course is: "How to look me in the EYE when talking to me" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greencoachdog Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 Looks like Commie Propaganda to me!!! Here's a few for the wimmins... 1. How to find your car in the Wal-Mart parking lot 2. How many pairs of shoes is enough? 3. Residential Blueprint reading (so they can find the kitchen in the house) 4. Lawnmower 101 5. Weedeater 101 6. Automotive maintainence (there's more to it than just gas 'n go) 7. Fish cleaning 101 (you aren't allergic to fish gut!) 8. There's more to life than a climate controlled environment 9. How to gift shop at the Sporting Goods store 10. How not to look/act like your mother Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarzan's Jane Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 Sorry to hear about your troubles GCD... Too bad you didn't marry a Canadian Woman...she'd be teaching how to ... ahhhh never mind Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
walleyejigger Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 nother fer wimmin Nothing, means..... nothing! ex. What are u thinkin of? - Nothing. Well u must be thinkin of something. -Nope. I don't care means.... i don't care! ex. What do u think of sky blue instead of ocean blue for the bedroom? - i don't care. - What do u mean u don't care? quit trying to analyze things, sometimes we just don't give a carp thanks for letting me vent Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greencoachdog Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 (edited) Sorry to hear about your troubles GCD...Too bad you didn't marry a Canadian Woman...she'd be teaching how to ... ahhhh never mind Dammit!!! She told me she was born in North Bay and that was her Mother and Sister that live in Janetville that we have to fly in to Canada to see!!! Why do you think I'm on this site??? It's ok for wimmins to bash the hell outta men, but we better not say one damn word aboot them.... > > > > > > > > > > Sounds typical. Edited April 7, 2008 by Greencoachdog Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maybe Posted April 8, 2008 Report Share Posted April 8, 2008 It's ok for wimmins to bash the hell outta men, but we better not say one damn word aboot them.... Hey, I'm thrilled you posted that Wimmins Training Guide - it's making me look good. Can I claim a bonus point for using Mossy Oak gift wrap on Jeff's presents? Twilight, don't think of it as a stupid grin - think of it as an enhanced range air quality warning system. When you're too far away for the audible alert, you can still read the "danger, keep away" sign. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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