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What's the difference between a golf ball and a car?


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Tiger's new movie is out: Crouching Tiger, Hidden Hydrant

 

Apparently the police asked Tiger's wife how many times she hit him. She said "I don't know exactly… but put me down for a 5."

 

Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole-in-one.

 

What were Tiger Woods and his wife doing out at 2.30 in the morning? They went clubbing

 

 

 

Phil Mickelson contacted Tiger's wife to pick up some tips on how to beat Tiger!

 

Tigers Attorneys issued the following statement: "Mr. Woods would like to take a mulligan."

 

 

Tiger's troubles started early today, where, on only his second ho, he drove through a water hazard and into the trees.

 

tiger woods called. he wanted to know if i'd play a couple of rounds with him. "sure, tiger," i told him. "you don't mind if i drive, do you? oh! uh, is elin coming with us? ok if she sits in the front seat?"

 

Tiger Woods was injured in a car accident as he pulled out of his driveway early Friday morning. It was Woods' shortest drive since an errant tee shot at the US Open.

 

and last but not least ..... What does Tiger Woods have in common with a baby seals?

 

They both get clubbed by Norwegiens.

Edited by capt bruce
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Darn, Tiger was a mailbox and a telephone pole short of his first "grand slam."

 

Ellin Woods, wife of Tiger, has a twin sister Josephine. If you look closely, It is easy to tell them apart. Elin is the one brandishing a 5 iron.

 

New Nike "TW" hat........$25

New Nike Golf Shoes......$125

New Cadillac Escalade....$60,000

New Nike Iron, wrapped around your head, By jealous wife..

 

......PRICELESS ! !

 

Ping just offered Elin Woods an endorsement contract pushing her own set of drivers. They said to named

Elin Woods..."clubs you can beat Tiger with."

 

Nike was quick to announce the new Elin Nordegren line of clubs. This latest addition to ladies golf does not include a putter for reasons Nike will not comment on, though they have grips shaped like knife handles, and rather than reducing your slice, they actually make your slice more accurate. Nike claims they can cut through the toughest rough, like say, the side of a large vehicle, and while they don't improve your own driving, they can in fact negatively impact the driving of anyone around you. Check them out- they're at dieyourottencheatingpig.com

Edited by capt bruce
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