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A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous

pasture in Alberta, when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him

out of a cloud of dust.

 

The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan

sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy,

"If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd,

will you give me a calf?"

 

Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully

grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?

 

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,

connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA

page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an

exact fix on his location, which he then feeds to another NASA

satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

 

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and

exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.

 

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image

has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL

database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with

email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

 

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech,

miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You

have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

 

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud.

 

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with

amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

 

Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what

your business is, will you give me back my calf?"

 

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"

 

"You're a Member of Parliament for the Canadian Government," says Bud.

 

"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

 

"No guessing required," answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even

though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already

knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth

of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and

you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or

about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep.

 

Now give me back my dog."

HH

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