Mission Possible

[JohnF]

After a protracted (that's thesaurus talk for long) exchange of pm's over the last few days with our own real-life adventure writer Drew (Moosebunk), I've got this notion that I should resurrect an old project that's been littering up my computers for a while now. It's a kid's (well - a teenager's) book. They aren't the kind of thing that make a million but they're fun to do cuz one can reconstruct one's own misspent youth, getting the girls one missed and kicking ass on the dicks who kicked mine in fact, although only occasionally cuz I wasn't exactly the smallest kid in school. The premise is a nerdy kid (not a lot unlike myself) who starts the story as something of a wussy but in the end turns out to be, if not a leader, at least well accepted by the "cool" kids, and he might even get the really hot chick at the end of the book. It's not that far off my own youthful years, growing up as a bookworm with too much IQ and too little self-confidence. I was the guy who totally murdered a winger in the corner, and then apologized for being so rough. I used to slow down so I didn't humiliate the guy who couldn't skate as well.

 

But enough about what a weeny I was then. Now I'm ready to kick ass and take names (so I can write a formal apology for the ass-kicking I guess).

 

I already have a few episodes in the can, so to speak, but I need more to have enough for an entire book. To that end I'm prostrating myself on the foredeck of a leaky tinny, begging for some of you kind souls to show me the world of your fishing specialty, be it carp, lakers, wallies, snot-rockets, muskies, salmon, steelhead, brook trout, suckers, cats, whatever. The sky's - well, the bottom of the river or lake I suppose - the limit. I have lots of free time during the summer months and am more than willing to travel to collect experiences.

 

The premise is that this uncool young guy is struggling to make his way in a world filled with guys who sense his insecurity and beat on him with it. He has no idea how cool he really is, and may never realize it, but I can promise that before the story's done, a few cool guys, and at least one very cool girl, will start to appreciate him, and a few real dickheads will be thoroughly humiliated, although they may not be smart enough to even figger it out.

 

That's hopefully enough to give you a sense of where I'm trying to go with this kid. What he needs are some fishing experiences that will flesh out his life and help him to make friends. If you think your style of fishing would help him in the cause to gain respect, and chicks, and are willing to tour me around your stomping grounds so I can make some notes (and have a little fun in the process) let me know. All you'll get in return is a (signed) copy of the book, if and when it ever gets published. I'm perfectly willing to pay at least my share of the gas or whatever is involved, and if it's really good stuff, there may be a bottle of Famous Grouse (a very under-rated scotch) or some decent wine in it for you.

 

I started this story about a kid who took up scuba diving, but it was getting way too technical and expensive for him to finish the story in a natural way. Fishing is second nature to those of use who grew up on a river, creek or lake in Ontario. It just makes so much more sense to write about that, and it comes off much more normal sounding.

 

My goal is to have a fun summer of fishing, and to end up with some decent material for my story. Who knows? You may even be enough of a character to rate a place in the stories? Heaven help you if that happens.

 

If you wanna show me around your home territory and your own special brand of fishing, let me know. Like I said, I'm wide open to experiences, and more than willing to pay the freight. That's one of the advantages of having 33 years of experience in a career, and a son to back me up when I'm out of contact. It's even better than retirement. I can pretend to be gainfully employed when in fact I'm screwing the pooch whenever I can, not that your own family pets should be nervous. If you take me out in your boat or whatever, you'll find I'm very generous in contributing more than my share of costs. I understand that it costs money to own a boat these days, and I sure don't expect a free ride.

 

So what can it cost any of you? If I turn out to be a total dickhead you'll have dork stories to tell the others here. If I turn out to be not such a bad guy after all you'll have a free day on the water at worst. And that shouldn't give the impression that I'm only interested in boat fishing experiences. I have waders too. So flyfishing, lake fishing, creek wading, whatever - call me. I'm free for the summer.

 

Have at me.

JF

[tjsa]

HUH???????????????????

[solopaddler]

One the more interesting members of the board in my estimation, I'd be happy to fish with you anytime John.

[Gerritt]

I think he looking to go out fishing with other members, so he can continue gaining life experiences giving him something to write about.

[Beats]

I'd be interested in reading the results. Sounds like a good method to get some first hand material to be used for possible characters. Makes for a great summer so long as your aren't in the water scribbling down notes when you should be fishing. I think a post that long with no pictures is sure to confuse some readers

[JohnF]

I think he looking to go out fishing with other members, so he can continue gaining life experiences giving him something to write about.

 

Life experiences I've got up the wazoo. It's fishing stories I need to gather.

 

Who knows? This may be just a cheesy ploy to learn about all yer honey holes.

 

JF

[Moosebunk]

John's a heckuva guy to shoot the breeze with but what I can't figure out is how our pm's about Hares Ear Nymphs jumped to ambitious summer time epic adventures in the quest for the next best seller. lol.

 

John........ care to explain? lol. j/k

[JohnF]

John's a heckuva guy to shoot the breeze with but what I can't figure out is how our pm's about Hares Ear Nymphs jumped to ambitious summer time epic adventures in the quest for the next best seller. lol.

 

John........ care to explain? lol. j/k

 

It was yer tales of the beautiful muse who steers yer boat when you go on those wilderness jaunts......... And these guys think you dream up those stories all on yer own.

 

JF

[danc]

HUH???????????????????

 

[HTHM]

It was yer tales of the beautiful muse who steers yer boat when you go on those wilderness jaunts......... And these guys think you dream up those stories all on yer own.

 

JF

So THAT'S Moosebunks secret, he has a muse. Perhaps he should respond to the call of the sirens perched on the rocks.

[scuro]

I think he looking to go out fishing with other members, so he can continue gaining life experiences giving him something to write about.

I think he actually wants to write a book and needs material. If you are looking to attract Moosebunk's muse so you too can catch monsterous fish, first you have to BE Moosebunk. That starts early in the morning with a breakfast composing of a wallop of lard, some toasted bagel slices on the side, and you wash it down with Baileys with a good nip of coffee mixed in.

Edited June 23, 2008 by scuro

[JohnF]

So THAT'S Moosebunks secret, he has a muse. Perhaps he should respond to the call of the sirens perched on the rocks.

 

He married one.

 

JF

[JohnF]

John's a heckuva guy to shoot the breeze with but what I can't figure out is how our pm's about Hares Ear Nymphs jumped to ambitious summer time epic adventures in the quest for the next best seller. lol.

 

John........ care to explain? lol. j/k

 

I thought you said hairy eared nympho. I figgered to each his own. Personally I prefer my nympho's ears to be something less than furry, unless she's a hobbit, of course.

 

JF

[JohnF]

One the more interesting members of the board in my estimation, I'd be happy to fish with you anytime John.

 

Thank you, and thanks to the others who've already responded here or in pm's.

 

I wasn't sure if I should even start this thread, that anyone would take me anywhere near seriously. As I've explained to some of you who have pm'ed me about it I've been toying with an idea for quite a while but I was getting bogged down in details because I had built it around scuba diving. Now those of you who've done any diving know that it can get durned expensive, particularly when you start to go the tech route. A properly equipped wreck or cave diver can easily be sporting $7,500 in gear on a single dive, thousands more for scooters, plus the expense of travel to Long Island, Mexico or Florida, accommodations, not to mention the cost of gases etc. Wrecks are a little easier to reach than caves but even in Kingston or Toby there are still gear and gas costs, and the training to get a diver to the tech level can be hefty.

 

It occurred to me that fishing is perfect for what I want to do. Accessible, inexpensive, easy to get started, and a challenge to do well - more allegorical possibilities than Aesop ever contemplated with his critters. The jury's out as to whether or not I have the creativity to make it happen, but I can sure have a helluva lot of fun doing some research this summer and beyond. This ain't an all-consuming passion with me, just a fun thing, so don't expect soul searing intensity if and when you meet me. I, like you, pull my pants on just one leg at a time - and sometimes I even forget to zip 'em up.

 

If nothing else I'll get to meet some of you in person and add to my personal fish caught list. That in itself ain't a bad thing. Anything else that comes of it is a bonus. I did the same thing when I took up scuba diving in 1998. Within a few years I was travelling to meet new friends in Pennsylvania, Ohio, Florida and Mexico to dive, and that was in addition to the trips to Kingston and Toby. I can even tell you Long Pointers where the perch hang out by the thousands in case you don't already know, and that Cormorants can and do dive 50' below the Lake Erie waves. Ontario's not just a great fishing destination. We have some of the very best natural wreck diving in the world.

 

So, my thanks to those of you who've taken my request at least semi seriously. I really am looking forward to getting out with as many of you as possible and seeing the different kinds of fishing you all get to enjoy in your respective back yards.

 

JF