Things you learn when you have a son....NF

[silveradosheriff]

1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.

 

 

2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.

 

 

3.) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.

 

 

4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing Batman underwear and

a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.

 

 

5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

 

 

6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.

 

 

7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too late.

 

 

8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

 

 

9.) A six-year-old boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old man says they can only do it in the movies.

 

 

10.) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4- year-old boy.

 

 

11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.

 

 

12.) Super glue is forever.

 

 

13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool, you still can't walk on water.

 

 

14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

 

 

15.) VCR's do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.

 

 

16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

 

 

17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

 

 

18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.

 

 

19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.

 

 

20.) The fire department in Austin, TX, has a 5-minute response time.

 

 

21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.

 

 

22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.

 

 

23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

 

 

24.) 80% of Women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without kids.

 

 

25.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.

[Big Cliff]

Now I have to go into town and buy some clorox LOL.

[pikehunter]

80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.

 

I'm going to introduce the garage to the laundry room!

 

I have to find out if this is true!

[Zib]

>>>25.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.<<<

 

Just as soon as it warms up outside consider it done.

[camillj]

Wow ... am thinking I might wanna wait till its warmer and try it outside

[kemper]

How true is that last one, its the first thing I thought when I read the brake fluid one!

[Bob]

Pretty funny even if most of it is dead wrong. I won't bother with the chlorox thing because I can't imagine anything in brake fluid that would react to chlorox so that it would smoke but right off the top, a king size water bed might have enough water to fill a hundred square foot room to four inches. It would get pretty thin over 2000 sq. ft., do the math. It did make me chuckle though.