Tuesday Morning funny N/F

[pikehunter]

With an apology to our resident attorney.

 

Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi Grandma a question they aren't prepared for.

 

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've know you since you were a boy, and frankly you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot and you haven't the brains to realize you will never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

 

The Lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'

 

She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is the worse in the state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes I know him.'

 

The defense attorney almost died.

 

The judge asked both attorneys to approach the bench and in a very quiet voice, said,

'If either of you idiots asks if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.'

[Terry]

LOL

[shane]

HAHAHA!

 

There's no shortage of jokes when lawyers are around.