oldphart Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35. For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy. Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some my father that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for awhile.. An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am. Old guys always get up early to pee, so what the hell. Besides, like I said, I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-bugger. If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser. Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling. They could lighten up on the obstacle course however... I've been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training. Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too... I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet. An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head. These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way. Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple million pissed off oldpharts with attitudes and automatic weapons, who know that their best years are already behind them. HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50...in menopause!!! You think MEN have attitudes?? Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put them on border patrol. They'll have it secured the first night! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OutdoorDan Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 This coupled with your screen name is brilliant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skipper D Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 Come on oldfart , i did'nt get to fish this weekend either ,take it easy on your self , the weather will change , just wait you'll see .......lol ... lol ...lol . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mercman Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 Excellent !!!! Where do i sign up ? Just keep me away from the border patrol , cause i''m living with the Brigadier General of that branch Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tybo Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 Their will be no warning shot.Old guy's are to cheap. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirWhite Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 lol you sound like my Dad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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