Redneck Driving Application

[mbac31]

Redneck Driver's Application

Last name: ________________

 

First name (check appropriate box):

 

[_] Billy-Bob

[_] Bobby-Sue

[_] Billy-Joe

[_] Bobby-Jo

[_] Billy-Ray

[_] Bobby-Ann

[_] Billy-Sue

[_] Bobby-Lee

[_] Billy-Mae

[_] Bobby-Ellen

[_] Billy-Jack

[_] Bobby-Beth-Ann

 

Age: ____ (if unsure, guess)

 

Sex: ____ M _____ F _____ Not sure

 

Shoe Size: ____ Left ____ Right

 

Occupation:

 

[_] Farmer

[_] Mechanic

[_] Hair Dresser

[_] Waitress

[_] Unemployed

[_] Dirty Politician

 

Spouse's Name: __________________________

2nd Spouse's Name: _________________________

3rd Spouse's Name: _________________________

Lover's Name: ____________________________

2nd Lover's Name: __________________________

 

Relationship with spouse:

 

[_] Sister [_] Aunt

[_] Brother

[_] Uncle

[_] Mother

[_] Son

[_] Father

[_] Daughter

[_] Cousin

[_] Pet

 

Number of children living in household: ___

Number of children living in shed: ___

Number of children that are yours: ___

 

Mother's Name: _______________________

Father's Name: _______________________

(If not sure, leave blank)

 

Education: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest grade completed)

 

Do you [_] own or [_] rent your mobile home?

 

Vehicles you own and where you keep them:

 

___ Total number of vehicles you own

___ Number of vehicles that still crank

___ Number of vehicles in front yard

___ Number of vehicles in back yard

___ Number of vehicles on cement blocks

 

Firearms you own and where you keep them:

 

____ truck

____ kitchen

____ bedroom

____ bathroom

____ shed

 

Model of your pickup: _____________

Year pickup produced: 194____

 

Do you have a gun rack?

 

[_] Yes [_] No; If no, please explain:_________________________

 

Newspapers/magazines you subscribe to:

 

[_] The National Enquirer

[_] The Globe

[_] MAXIM

[_] TV Guide

[_] Soap World

[_] Rifle and Shotgun

 

___ Number of times you've seen a UFO

___ Number of times you've seen Elvis

___ Number of times you've seen Elvis in a UFO

 

How often do you bathe:

 

[_] Weekly

[_] Monthly

[_] Not Applicable

 

How many teeth? ___

Color of teeth:

 

[_] Yellow

[_] Brownish-Yellow

[_] Brown

[_] Black

[_] N/A

 

Brand of chewing tobacco you prefer:

 

[_] Red-Man

 

How far is your home from a paved road?

 

[_] 1 mile

[_] 2 miles

[_] don't know

[Greencoachdog]

I'm sorry, but someone has misinformed you. That was our census poll!

 

... all you have to do to get a drivers license, is show them your fishin' or huntin' license!

[Billy Bob]

HEY, I resemble this thread