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DNR orders


Old Ironmaker

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We let Mom rest Thursday and I am going to thank you ahead of time for your condolences, thanks all. The reason I post this is that I want you all to be aware of what the wishes are of your loved ones including yourselves. Mom had a DNR order, do not resuscitate, but her wishes were not on record at the retirement home they are at. The paramedics worked on her for 25 minutes and then got vital signs. Needless to say she went into a coma and was on life support. They tried a medical procedure that lowers body temp then bring it back to normal over 36 hours that has a 3% chance of bringing someone back. Then what? A close friend told me his Mom went through the same thing and laid in a nursing home for 5 years blind, deaf and unable to move.  After the procedure they did a scan that showed basically zero brain activity for Mary Rose DiFilippo. So the Family had to make that dreadful decision to stop resuscitation. Dad at 91 is devastated but doing better everyday, he is a lost soul, together almost 65 years. 3 long hours watching her gasp for air before she passed surrounded by her Family. That is something no one wants to witness guys, believe me.

The reason and the only reason I post this is if you have elderly parents, or you yourselves or loved ones have a DNR order make sure it is on record and those close know what it is. I have found there are Medic Alert bracelets and necklaces that say just that. Some have tattoos on their bodies where vital signs are taken that say DNR, I'm getting one. It's going to say take me out on my boat and throw me overboard. What are you gonna do, cry?

Think about it folks.

 

 

 

Edited by Old Ironmaker
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Old Ironmaker you have my sympathies for your situation.

The thing with DNR orders is they are only enforceable with written doctors orders.

Most times first responders will not have these available to them. Nor will emergency departments at hospital accept them without a written one on hand.

Bracelets or tattoo's will not meet the requirements for first responders to accept.

Edited by Woodsman
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OI again, sorry for your loss. My family went througt that with my dad. After and operation and after seeing him. They asked, what if, we said nothing he passed with an hour or so.

Mom, we/they knew it was coming ,  and they kept her comfortable and passed on with no pain.

I have seen people lay there for years and with no sign of recovery, why? Everyone suffers in this situation. 

When my mom was in, Dr Maida , An amazing person told us this is a war we can fight but the outcome will be the same.  She was 90+ we let nature take her course and shortly after she passed.

It will happen and why suffer.

Edited by ketchenany
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I'm so sorry for your loss OI. With your support and those of his family, I hope your dad can find peace knowing her suffering is over.

On the dnr, my dad died after we asked the doctors for no heroics and to let him go. It was a tough decision for us but the best for him as his chances were next to none. 

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Condolences Old, I feel your pain, I lost a brother yesterday evening. I don't know what the differences in the laws are between our countries, but I think here you need a living will that specifically states DNR.

There are other things to be aware of also,  my brother specifically requested to be cremated, and now we find out that the cemetery will not allow him to be interred there next to mom and dad because of that.

Two uncles, an aunt, and now a brother since Christmas, it's been a tough year! 

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My condolences to you as well my Buckeye buddy. You have gone through a lot. Ohioans  are a tough bunch, I know that from my days in Youngstown.

Thanks for the heads up Woodsman. You are 100% correct, it's not as cut and dry as I thought here in On. The 24 nursing staff at the retirement residence has the documentation on file but Mom didn't update it. Dad wants resuscitation, he's 91 and says he will live too 100, I bet he does.

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So sorry for your loss.

My Mom and Dad had alzheimers, what we had setup with the homes was a DNR and if they got really sick, it was no meds unless they could take it orally. The only thing intravenously to be given was pain meds so they would not suffer.

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I would also encourage anyone with relatives nearing death to talk about palliative care and the possibility of going to a hospice. There are some very special people working in those fields who can make these difficult situations much easier. 

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