Wow, sounds like you are in a lot of pain both physically and potentially financially.
I've had lower back problems from the time I was 18 until now and I'm 58. Luckily I don't think I have any really serious damage. I can control my problems with exercise and proper posture.
What I want to suggest to you is that you buy yourself a back brace at a building supply place. They used to be really available, but I haven't seen a lot of them lately. The won't fix your problem, but they will allow you to function a lot better. For me they were a life saver. You could get out of bed, do your business in the bathroom, put your socks on, etc., etc.
Try it. You'll like it.